My Wife
I am married to Subaida, my father's sister's daughter. During marriage my wife was only 16 and I was 23. Marriage was in Kayamkulum in Aug 22 1965. I was then working in TKM Quilon.
Due to her younger age she was childish and was not knowing any cooking. So she was with my parents in Cochin and I was in Quilon. Every Friday evening I used to go to Cochin and return to Quilon by Monday morning. I took a rented house in Mangad and took her and 2 children by 1968. My sister and family also with us to support her. My brother in law was draftsman in TKM. The house was very big and almost like haunted one. My wife became anemic and had to undergo treatment.
We shifted to another rented house in third mile stone and my sisters family shifted to another house near ours. As she was week we had to keep servants then. My wife slowly recovered and became smarter. She even supported me and gave me courage in my hard times. She was never greedy willing to help all physically and financially.
When I went to Bombay with family for PhD she rose to the occasion and took up the complete responsibility of the house and children so that I could complete my studies very fast. I am really indebted to her for the support she gave.
After our return from Bombay my father in law and then my mother in law died. This made her sad but she withstood that. By 1979 we became parents of 5 children. Their upbringing and schooling expenses were big and salary during that time was small. With one income we were srtuggling, then she started stitching skirts to support family. Both my wife and children gave me complete cooperation to lead simple life without asking any help from anyone. All praise to Allah My son got admission in Engineering in Merit seat without even going for any entrance coaching. My daughter's marriage in 1989 at Coxhin was a miracle. Alhamdulillah We managed without help from anyone. Of course we had to take debt from some which we cleared selling our house in Kadappakada. My son also got married in 1990.
By the Grace of Allah I got a job in Muscat by 1991 and our condition became good. My wife and 2 children with us there and again she managed everything. We could go for Hajj and buy a house in Ernakulum. My son also got job there and he brought his family. We enjoyed the life there. After returning I retired from TKM in 1997 and we lived till 1999 in Trivandrum.
We came to Cochin then took up Principal post in YCET in 2006 where I got full recognition and job satisfaction . We were Back to Cochin in 2009. Unfortunately my wife started showing symptoms of memory loss may be due to the tough times she had and the seclusion many years. Anyway it is a test to us and we pray to Allah to save her from humiliation and total dependance. Due to her we were in Kuwait mostly as 3 of my sons are here with family.
We completed 50 years of successful married life on 22nd Aug 2015
In 2015 doctors in Kuwait diagnosed gall bladder stone of size 2.3 cm. My sons and daughter in laws are taking proper care of her. We are planning to shift her to Gems Hospital in Coimbatore for the gall bladder operation. On 2nd Dec 2015 she is admitted in Coimbatore Hospital and they have made various tests keeping in ICU. Alhamdulillah Operation was conducted on 7th Dec and she is improving. She is brought to Cochin by 12th Dec. She is still weak.
We decided to return to Kuwait as it is better to keep her where all sons and family are there. So we came back to Kuwait on 12th March 2016.
As my gr son was gettimg married at Cochin we brougnt her back in July 2018 and decided to keep here
Subaida has supported me in all my hard times, managed the house fully, inspired me to further studies and helped all who wanted help. She has even fought with family members for the welfare of others and given the right direction to our children. She is now in a critical condition.
May Allah forgive all her mistakes and bless her to have a happy ending Aameen
All my sons and daughter in laws helped her for about 4 years when she was laid up.
On Tuesday 16th April 2019 , 5.30 pm my wife breathed her last at home in Cochin in the presence of my second daughter in law Fathima when I was attending burial of another relative. Allah has saved her from the torture she had for last 4 years. We lived together for about 54 years. All these years she tolerated me and served me to the extent possible. May Allah give her Jannatul Firdous Aameen
Dr.Mohamed Ali Essa
Dr.Mohamed Ali Essa
